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Dating Advice
Discussion: Should I make the first move?
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gSrgeek333 gSrgeek333 |
Should I make the first move?
Mar 23 2008, 5:54 PM EDT OK, I'm a girl and I known this guy, for a long time actually, and just recently I've started to fall for him. He's very smart and down-to-earth. I honestly think he likes me too; he constantly sits next to me, blushes around me, and always wants to start a conversation. To me, that sounds like an invitation to ask him out, but I'm very afraid and I'm sure he'd be embarrassed if I was the one to ask him out(he's a little old fashioned). I've flirted with him, trying to give him a signal that I like him back, but no matter what I do, he won't go any farther than previously stated. I've be waiting quite a while for him to make his move, but I'm concerned either he's too scared to ask me, or just not interested. Help? 3 out of 3 found this valuable. Do you? |
 minnie_moink |
RE: Should I make the first move?
Mar 25 2008, 9:48 PM EDT Well if what you say is true I would ask him out. If you honestly think he likes you then it would be a confident gamble. My friend always told herself she honestly thought he liked her, but we could all see that she was lying to herself for pleasure, and he disliked her immensily...So if you honestly aren't lying to yourself then I would ask him out.- But be careful. -sincerely- -minnie_moink 1 out of 1 found this valuable. Do you? |
 kathyschwadel |
RE: Should I make the first move?
Mar 26 2008, 2:59 PM EDT You absolutely should make the first move. Men are shy. More important, they need more than a few flirting moves to get that you're interested and not smiling because he has breadcrumbs in his beard. A fellow named Richard Bandler did a study on flirting and found that 3 out of 4 men had NO CLUE a when a woman was flirting with them. So, you've got to take some initiative. I did. It's how I met my current husband. Basically, you don't just ask a guy out. You engage him in conversation by using something in your surroundings to talk about. Men are shyer than we think. You simply get the ball rolling--ask him where he bought his tee shirt, talk about a school assignment...whatever. Just get a dialogue going. If you know he's into sports, and you are too, walk in with a copy of the paper and mention how psyched you are about how well your team played last night. Pick something you can be sincere about. That can lead to talk about your favorite players which eventually can lead to you suggesting you catch an afternoon game together, since none of your girlfriends are into sports. You get the drift. With a lot of guys, you just have to start talking and then stand back as the floodgates open. But even when you chat guys up, they still aren't sure if you like them as more than a friend. So when you feel comfortable, that's when you suggest checking out that ballgame or movie together sometime. Most guys will plan it from there because you've spelled out your desire to see them again. But, if your guy doesn't, text him in a day and ask what day works for him. And, you don't have to be sure he's interested to make that first move. You're only making a general light and breezy comment, so no sweat if he doesn't roll with it. But if you want some indications that he likes you too, (and blushing is a good one) read THE TOP TEN SIGNS HE'S INTO YOU at www.grabyourtiger.com. Go for it! 3 out of 3 found this valuable. Do you? |